A Two Timing Valentine        [Part 3 of My Valentine's Day Trilogy]

 

Song lyrics by Chrome Dome Mike Kimbro

 

Please read along to my Spoken Verse Performance.

 

 

VERSE 1

 

As I think back to sixth grade.

 

Felicia was a filly so fine.

 

In the school band she played baritone,

 

Held her sweet hand, all the way home,

 

We called it ‘going steady’, at the time.

 

 

VERSE 2

 

Yeah, I was sure that we would marry.

 

Then came that awful day in February.

 

She handed out cards to the other guys.

 

Called ‘em sweetie and cutie pie.

 

She was a two timing valentine.

 

 

CHORUS

 

I opened up her Valentine card.

 

Then reality hit me hard.

 

She gave one to every guy she knew.

 

And every girl, and the teacher too.

 

The girl’s a two timing valentine.

 

 

A heart with a bite missing made of Reese's peanut butter with milk chocolate.

VERSE 3

 

So listen to these words, and this melody,

 

Look for (the) (sure) signs of infidelity.

 

She’ll brake your heart into pieces,

 

Then take a bite of one made of Reese’s.

 

The girl’s a two timing valentine.

 

 

CHORUS

 

I opened up her Valentine card.

 

Then reality hit me hard.

 

She gave one to every guy she knew.

 

And every girl, and the teacher too.

 

Yeah, she’s a two timing valentine.

 

 

BRIDGE

 

One minute, you’re in the cloakroom,

 

Osculating like there’s no tomorrow.

 

Then bam, your babe lowers the boom,

 

Flirting with your homies, like Charo.

 

 

It’s enough to drive a man mad,

 

If he’s the least bit insecure.

 

And it’s doubly so when you're a lad,

 

Who's lovesick, and can't find a cure.

 

 

I was sure that what we had

 

Was a blessing from up above.

 

But her evil ways made me sad,

 

When I caught her spreading the love.

 

 

During recess we would lock lips,

 

Behind the play ground bleachers.

 

Then something changed, and she flips

 

For a balding science teacher.

 

 

From the Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 Valentine's Day Card collection by Marvel Comics and the Paper Magic Group of Moosic, PA.

Hey, it’s not my intention,

 

To merely solicit your pity.

 

I advise the full abstention,

 

Of females who are pretty.

 

 

If you pick a girl that's plain,

 

Your heart might not be skewered.

 

And you’ll avoid an awful pain,

 

Like what old John Wick endured.

 

 

So guys, be especially wary,

 

Of your girl friend’s wondering eye.

 

And if it’s middle February,

 

Pay attention to stuff that she buys.

 

 

Should she spend her whole allowance.

 

On greeting cards and candy hearts.

 

Her feelings, and yours, are out of balance.

 

That’s when the pain and anguish starts.

 

 

CHORUS

 

I opened up her Valentine card.

 

Then reality hit me hard.

 

She gave one to every guy she knew.

 

And every girl, and the teacher too.

 

Yeah, she’s a two timing valentine.

 

 

CLOSING

 

Paraphrasing Franklin D.:

 

2/14 will surely be,

 

A day that lives eternally,

 

In puppy love infamy.

 

 

Keywords:  Poems about infidelity, Poems about Valentine's Day Cards, Poets educated at Phoenix Emerson Elementary School on Palm Lane.