Wild Berry Pies
A poem by Chrome Dome Mike Kimbro
Consider reading along to my Spoken Verse Performance!
INTRO
Wild berry pies
Wild berry pies
Now the threat of cancer
Yeah, it might be scary.
But I've got the answer,
In a slice of wild berry.
Eat wild berry pies,
To beat oxidative stress.
VERSE 1
If you’ve recently read an article,
On healthy living web sites or magazines.
You know the hot term is ‘oxidative stress’.
And it’s time you learn what that means.
When free radicals enter into a cell,
They form bad stuff like hydrogen peroxide.
Now anti-oxidants insure that all is well,
By scavenging FR’s before they get inside.
Cause once inside, your DNA could get mutated.
Or at least that’s what I’ve been led to believe.
To make this point, I’ll have it restated.
In different contexts, but I’d never deceive. ;~)
VERSE 2
Back in Egypt, Moses was a king trainee
And he excelled in obelisk construction
Then he helped the Jews get across the Red Sea
Where Pharaoh’s army met its destruction.
The tribes set up camp near a big Sinai hill
Which Moses climbed, but was late in descending
Brother Aaron knew it wouldn’t be long until
The Jews sinned...cause #goldcalfworship was trending.
But Abraham’s God knew the reason why
His hungry children were getting out of hand
So He sent them Manna, which was anti-oxidant high.
And they marched on to the Promised Land.
VERSE 3
Now let’s go to ancient Sparta, Greece
Feared far and wide for it's fierce fighting force
Bad asses born and bred to battle in their briefs.
They’d beat the Navy Seals and the Norse.
Now forget all you know of the Thermopylae battle,
Three hundred Spartans vs the Persian Hoard.
Sure, the Greeks did make the Persians skedaddle,
But they did it without raising a sword.
“What’s the word?”, was asked of King Xerxes?
“Let’s head back home.”, was his sad reply.
For, more than Spartans, he dreaded disease.
The Greeks had cut off the fresh BROCCOLI supply.
VERSE 4
Way back before the Paleogene
It was dinosaurs that were feared
Then an extinction event intervened.
And the damn things all disappeared.
The astrogeologists have decided
Based on the evidence that they know.
This event occurred when a comet collided
With the Gulf of Mexico.
My theory on why the barney's bought the farm.
Doesn't include a flaming ball of iridium
I'm thinking oxidative stress did all the harm.
And it was cancer to which T-Rex succumbed.
CHORUS
Wild berry pies
Wild berry pies
Now the threat of cancer
Yeah, it might be scary.
But I've got the answer,
In a slice of wild berry.
Eat wild berry pies,
To beat oxidative stress.
VERSE 5
Of the fictional groups, like X-Men or the Sith.
We're fascinated most by the race: Vampire.
But why commit so much attention to just a myth.
It's like they say: "Where there's smoke there's fire."
Per the scribes it's only warm blood they consume. [@ Legend says: it's only warm blood they consume.]
That's a theory to which I'm not a subscriber.
OK, I'll buy off on Drac's all black costume.
But what's their source of roughage and fiber?
If you check the coffins where they crash.
Every morning right around five o'clock.
I'm betting you'll find their fresh CARROT stash.
Don't be surprised if they ask: "Vhat's up, Doc?"
VERSE 6
I really don’t think we’ll be under attack
When the aliens finally head out our way.
So don’t worry about our “First Contact”
Being something out of Independence Day.
They’d go places with no Earthlings to bother,
Like asteroids, where precious metals exude.
Unless, of course, their motors run on sea water.
In which case, we’re all pretty much screwed.
Sure, resources they’ll want, but expect to find.
That they’ve come from a planet that’s sicker,
But they’ll have technology that’ll blow your mind.
Like a solar powered cherry tomato picker.
But if I'm wrong, they'll need help on the farms.
Tending garlic and turmeric by hand.
So when you hear the invasion alarms...
Might be your chance to get "back to the land."
Mark my words, they’ll arrive at the end of summer,
And might start picking the leaves of green tea.
They'll take our papaya, which is a real bummer,
Cause that’s all I ate on my last trip to Maui.
CHORUS
Wild berry pies
Wild berry pies
Now the threat of cancer
Yeah, it might be scary.
But I've got the answer,
In a slice of wild berry.
Eat wild berry pies,
To beat oxidant fatigue.
VERSE 7
So if you’re smart, you’ll take free radicals
Seriously, since your death could depend on them.
Fresh fruits and veggies you should see as your pals.
Multi-vitamins are worth what you spend on them.
But all that nutrition doesn’t really matter
If your body can’t metabolize it
That’s why you gotta drink lots of water
It’s time to grow up, if you despise it.
But along with diet, get eight hours sleep.
Your body and mind need time for chillin’.
Work on karma, cause you sow what you reap.
And live a long life, the Good Lord willin’.
The End.
Copyright © Michael Kimbro 2013. All rights reserved.
PS - Find the state fair winning recipe for this incredible wild berry pie at:
http://www.pillsbury.com/recipes/wild-berry-pie/bff36011-43f9-4a0c-bd3b-9f97e786817d
Or simply order what appears to be the mother of all wild berry pies ( $73.15...yikes! ) at:
