Portal Gratification                      [Part 3 of my College Trilogy]

 

An original poem by Chrome Dome Mike Kimbro

 

Recommendation: read along to my Spoken Verse Performance recording.

 

 

VERSE 1

 

In the genre: science fiction,

 

Two movies stand out from back in the day.

 

"Close Encounters..." deals with an attraction.

 

While "Stargate" focuses on a pathway.

 

 

VERSE 2

 

The attraction part concerns a strong yearning,

 

For the green grass that grows on the other side.

 

The pathway leads to a different place of learning,

 

It's the portal that some coaches have decried.

 

 

The names are withheld to protect the guilty.

 

 

CHORUS

 

Gratification!

 

Lack of playing time is absurd.

 

Gratification!

 

Kick your current coach to the curb.

 

Your rejection will be painful,

 

But he'll get over it.

 

Now defection is not shameful,

 

Go on, find a perfect fit.

 

Talking heads will start to spinnin',

 

With the titles you'll be winnin'.

 

So get ya some of that, what they call...

 

Portal Gratification.

 

 

BRIDGE #1

 

P is for the POTENTIAL you can reach now.

 

O is for the OTHER school you'll score.

 

R is for the REPUTATION of which you're free.

 

T is for the TIME you'll waste no more.

 

A is for ASKING, which will make Coach sadden.             

 

L is for your LIKENESS, kicking ass on Madden.

 

 

VERSE 3

 

Your high school coach called in lots of favors,

 

So you'd be on a roster of the Power Five.

 

It was then up to you to join the game players.

 

But that monumental day hasn't arrived.

 

 

VERSE 4

 

A high school god, you had one deficiency.

 

College demands max performance in the clutch.

 

Fact is, true talent comes with consistency.

 

But your gift, athleticism, not so much?

 

 

VERSE 5

 

I'm guessing that blame should go to a parent,

 

For why you weren't prepared to ride the pine.

 

Dad once said: "Sitting one game out was abhorrant!!!"

 

Now it's: "Just get a ring! From then on you'll be fine."

 

 

Here's Chrome Dome Mike pictured with his short lived University of Louisville Cardinal wall clock.

VERSE 6

 

Even those worshipped, still feel aggravation.

 

You see, Steve Winwood once sang of "Higher Love."

 

Some feel he meant an extreme adoration,

 

Which rains down on warriors from above.

 

 

Like the kind players feel in...

 

Lexington, Lawrence, Louisville...and Tuscaloosa.

 

 

BRIDGE #2

 

Some athletes will get the 1 or 2 or 3 year itch.

 

Instead of free throws, they practice their elevator pitch.

 

Attracted to the new wave "athlete centered approach",

 

They're fed up with philosophies which favor the coach.

 

Changing the leadership structure won't do much harm,

 

Although player-coach sounds too much like Animal Farm.

 

Fresh college programs come with lots of pampering.

 

(And innovative ways to engage in tampering.)

 

Coaches use the hand shake line to set up their dates.

 

They understand that complements are the best bait.

 

Then they top those flirtations with a smile that's sleazy.

 

No need for campus visits! Yeah, baby, poaching's that easy...

 

During the NCAA's Transfer Portal Era.

 

 

VERSE 7

 

If you stay there at State, only 18 year olds,

 

Will think that you are cool, fresh and sexy.

 

At a new school, your intrigue will grow 4 fold,

 

Although most will have put on the Freshman XV.   [Read: The Freshman Fifteen Pounds]

 

 

VERSE 8

 

Make the move to a Target Rich Environment,

 

Where needing to dress warm is not a worry.

 

But if a party school is a requirement,

 

Don't be drawn to DePauw, or Duke, or Drury.

 

 

VERSE 9

 

Consider: A team captain might become fatigued,

 

Of telling coach the latest locker room chatter.

 

Once the C's worn, they'll seek out a new league,   [read: conference]

 

If relations with teammates even matter.

 

 

It's time for a twist in the plot!

 

 

VERSE 10

 

Just signed: a recruit that's quick and wild-eyed.

 

Now coach is trying to clear out the deadwood.

 

Pundits have lit a fire beneath his backside.

 

AD is breathing down his neck like a boss should.

 

 

VERSE 11

 

Strangely, only 3 players were invited.

 

To a special meeting held near season's end.

 

For something called "The Portal", Coach says he's ex-cited.

 

And you thought that the old boy was your friend.

 

 

lol.

 

The album To Oblivion is one of my favorites. I do not possess rights to this album cover image.

VERSE 12

 

Is the need to be promoted commercially,

 

The reason you'll change to Austinite or Floridian?

 

Hey, even Curling is rife with uncertainty.

 

Know a college transfer might lead...

 

TO OBLIVION.

 

 

Let's close out on a serious note.

 

 

VERSE 13

 

To those who doubt Portal Power's success,

 

In disrupting the college sports status quo.

 

"Check out LSU Hoops News," that's what I suggest.

 

Where Thirteen left, after the coach had to go.

 

 

CHORUS

 

Gratification!

 

Lack of playing time is absurd.

 

Gratification!

 

Kick your current coach to the curb.

 

Your rejection will be painful,

 

But he'll get over it.

 

Now defection is not shameful,

 

Go on, find a perfect fit.

 

Talking heads will start to spinnin',

 

With the titles you'll be winnin'.

 

So go on. Get ya some of that, what they call...

 

Portal Gratification.

 

 

The End

 

 

Copyright Michael Kimbro 2022.  All rights reserved.