The One Who Dropped The Ball                   [Part 2 of my Employment Trilogy]

 

An original poem by Chrome Dome Mike Kimbro

 

Please read along to my Spoken Verse Performance.

 

 

VERSE 1

 

Hanging on the wall of my locker.

 

Is an "Employee of the Month" plaque.

 

Yeah, at work I'm one hell of a talker.

 

At home, just a literary hack.

 

 

VERSE 2

 

As a purveyor of boxes of stuff.

 

The bosses know that I've got skills.

 

But large commission checks just aren't enough.

 

Five star ratings are required to thrill.

 

 

VERSE 3

 

Perfect performance is expected,

 

So I'm forced to sit back and bide my time.

 

Someone fails to do their job as directed.

 

Only then can this salesman truly shine.

 

 

VERSE 4

 

So when our system works good.

 

And the supply chain has no kinks.

 

And buyers read instructions, like they should.

 

That's when my ratings tend to sink.

 

 

VERSE 5

 

In those times, when taken for granted,

 

I need customer satisfaction to fall.

 

Because when buyers are disenchanted,

 

This handsome white knight is always on call.

 

Yeah, I give thanks to the one who dropped the ball.

 

 

VERSE 6

 

Some appreciate the work that I do.

 

Like my wife, when I deposit the green.

 

But I wonder what she'd think, if she knew,

 

That I yearn for breakdowns in the machine.

 

 

VERSE 7

 

When the system runs at it's crappiest.

 

And customers pick up the phone to vent.

 

Rest assured, that's when I'm the happiest.

 

Because I enjoy it when my ear gets bent.

 

 

VERSE 8

 

I hear sweet music, when customers grumble.

 

Since it allows me I come to the rescue.

 

At weekly meetings, it's hard to be humble,

 

When my ratings soar, and I continue,

 

To give thanks to the one who dropped the ball.

 

 

VERSE 9

 

Sometimes it's easy to be a hero,

 

When 5 star ratings come with ease.

 

Where customer expectations are zero,

 

The bar is low, so I'm guaranteed to please.

 

 

VERSE 10

 

If you can't understand my message,

 

I'll provide a relationship parallel.

 

Did your old flame treat you to foot massage?

 

If not, it would be a cinch to ring your bell.

 

And as I rounded base number one,

 

I'd smile and offer thanks to the one,

 

The guy or gal who dropped the ball.

 

The End

 

Copyright Michael Kimbro 2019.  All rights reserved.