Handsome Woman Blues

Fitness diva Jillian Michaels, a classic handsome woman. 

Song lyrics by Chrome Dome Mike Kimbro


A parody of my poem "Makeup and Gloves"


Structure:  All accents align, with two or three exceptions.


Read along to my Spoken Verse Performance!





With my posse at an up town bar,


It’s a stretch to say that we’re gallant.


Got our eyes on the door,


As with words we spar,


While checking out all the talent.



A classic night, just a constant stream


Of buxom blondes, red heads, and bold brunettes.


But I want much more in my ladies,


And handsome is as good as it gets.


Sigourney Weaver, the official handsome woman of sci-fi movies such as Alien, Aliens, and of course, Ghostbusters.

Yeah, handsome is as good as it gets.





Yeah, my homies say that they’re impressed


With the fine fillies they are scopin’.


But I bide my time,


Play it close to the vest,


I try to keep my options open.



So there I sat, playing angry birds,


I'd turned a deaf ear to my friends.


Then something deep within me stirred.


A handsome woman strolled on in.  ("Hubba-hubba")


A handsome woman strolled on in. 



Once serious handsome woman actress is Diane Salinger, in the role of security officer Melanie in the sci-fi thriller "Creature".



Hey, I’m never slow to take the shot,


Once the cross hairs are on my prey.


Soon as she took a seat,


I made my move,


Had our waitress send her a cabernet.



We hit it off, and in just a month


I knew I loved her like no other.


And then I bought a ring, ‘cause I knew.


My kids would have a handsome mother.


My kids would have a handsome mother.





Say what you want about their looks,


But these chicks bring the gusto.


That’s why I’ve taken time to pen,


This handsome wo-manifesto.


Here's the fair haired handsome woman Sarah Jessica Parker of "Honeymoon In Vegas" and "Sex in the City" fame.




In line for the movie “I Am Legend”


It’s a night I’d like to erase.


Woman glanced at my girl


and then said to her friend:


“Don’t look but that chick’s gotta horse face.”   ("Oh no she didn't!")



Yeah, it was on, my girl sure was pissed.


But who knew that pulling hair would be assault!?!


Then the police came and cuffed her sweet wrists.


I told the judge it wasn’t her fault.     ("He wasn't listening")


I told the judge it wasn’t her fault.





Once a month I see my handsome love,


The classic orange jump suit worn my many women in jail and prison these days.

Bearing dark chocolates and red roses.


When your love’s behind bars,


Yeah it’s tough, but at least,


You know what the cost of her clothes is.



I’m on the road to my handsome chick.


It takes all day, hey, I wouldn’t miss it.


Hopin' this time I won’t be all that quick.


Anjelica Huston as Morticia Addams, portrays a classic handsome woman in all the films in which she stars, including The Royal Tenenbaums, The Grifters, and Blood Work.

It’s gonna be a conjugal visit.   ("Oh, yeah")


It’s gonna be a conjugal visit.





Two long years of hell ‘til she got paroled.


Lots of cold showers there at the end.


As the doors opened up,


What did I behold?


My love was with her handsome girl friend.



Annie Lennox, the diva who comes to mind when handsome women are the subject matter. 

Then I went through problems with the law,


Just cause I had two fine handsome ‘wormans’.


So we moved on out to sunny Utah,


Where we all became handsome Mormons.   ("We've got the undies.")


Where we all became handsome Mormons.


The End


Copyright © Michael Kimbro 2013.  All rights reserved.




Note:  Click Here for the Urban Dictionary's definition of 'Handsome Woman'.



Keywords:  Poems about handsome women, Poetry about beauty, Handsome women poetry.