"I Have To Thank Bane", a poem about PPE and COVID-19.

I Have To Thank Bane

An original poem by Chrome Dome Mike Kimbro

Consider reading along to my Spoken Verse Performance.

The Kimbro Tri-Strap Face Mask was inspired by the character Bane from The Dark Knight Rises movie.

VERSE 1

People ask how I got the title:

The Exhalted Chrome Dome Mike.

I tell them it's because I have no rival,

Crafting masks that healthcare workers like.

VERSE 2

Making cool face shields was my first task.

But getting all the parts was a pain.

So I turned my focus to making face masks.

Stealing the design from badass Bane.

CHORUS

I have to thank Bane.

Everyone thinks that I'm quite insane.

When I tell 'em:

I have to thank Bane.

VERSE 3

Once they emptied the PPE stores,

Extreme measures became required.

Now I'm able to make up to four,

From bras that are underwired.

CHORUS

I have to thank Bane.

Everyone thinks that I'm quite insane.

When I tell 'em:

I have to thank Bane.

Here's the author sporting a stylish Tri-Strap Face Mask, as he is questioningly regarded by the Batman comic villain Bane, from DC Comics.

VERSE 4

I often donate a license fee check.

To some health care worker causes.

What's the real reason they put a medal round my neck:

I gave the gals an excuse to go braless.

CHORUS

They oughta thank Bane.

Everyone thinks that I'm quite insane.

When I tell 'em:

I have to thank Bane.

VERSE 5

Much of my humor is self-effacing.

Read my poems all you like, and laugh away.

I hope you don't mind that I'm embracing,

A villain who lost out to Anne Hathaway.

CHORUS

I have to thank Bane.

Everyone thinks that I'm quite insane.

When I tell 'em:

I have to thank Bane.

The End.

PS - As with a select few of my other efforts, particularly "The Colocation Center", "My Belle Meade Bride", and "The Las Vegas Strip", I was left with what I call "poetic remnants". These are verses which didn't quite make the grade, but might shed light on the literary methods which I employ.

The 1st such remnant was inspired by President Trump's mention of "unrest" in a recent press conference.

VERSE - The Presidential Medal of Freedom

The President spoke, from the Rose Garden's deck.

Suggesting that idle hands bring lawlessness.

But then he placed a medal around my neck,

For my steadfast pursuit of bralessness.

In the 2nd poetic remnant, I return to a common source of inspiration, The Rature.

VERSE - The Second Coming

From a Rapture dream, I sat up in bed.

Hey, in that one, I was heading for the clouds.

Those who were taken had a Tri-Strap on their head.

Or, at least, had the brains to avoid crowds.

Thanks for your time and consideration.